A short while ago, shocking pregnancy pictures, and I’m not talking of a cute baby bump, we’re talking full pregnancy pictures, of Ghanaian actress, Yvonne Nelson, came out for her birthday and of course, got a lot of tongues wagging as most people did not even know she was pregnant to begin with. I read the story, something about leaving her fiancéè to be a baby mama and what not, but just filed it away. Then I got talking with a friend of mine about her movies and of course we landed there. She pointed out to me where the actress said in an interview that “if you are a woman and you think you are getting to a certain age and you want to have kids and you meet a responsible guy who hasn’t yet proposed but wants to do the same thing, it depends on you and him. You can go ahead and do it if you think the guy is right and responsible and he makes you happy. Why not?”
She then said that she actually agreed with Yvonne Nelson on the subject; that the ‘tradition’ of getting married then having a child created by society was totally clichéd and that people should be able to choose freely whichever order they wanted it to come. Of course, she couldn’t do without including the part where she said that “responsible men were hard to find”. The word “responsible” suddenly took a new meaning for me. I mean, when did people start using “responsible” when talking about men who didn’t want to get married? I thought the ‘responsible’ thing to do was make an honest woman out for the lady by putting a ring on it before getting her pregnant. When did it become the other way around?
Now, I guess it probably means that if the guy is financially buoyant or actually really wants a family, it’s okay to get a lady pregnant and be ‘responsible’ for both mother and child without actually marrying her. Or is it just me that finds this whole meaning confusing? I mean, how responsible is he if he won’t get married? He’s a good guy, wants a family, has the financial means to take care of them, then what’s the problem? Let’s make a family! Is that what it’s all about now? I suppose I still believe in the old-fashioned way of going about this particular matter. Be you the most responsible man in the planet, love me die join sef, if you ain’t put a ring on it, and this time, I mean a WEDDING ring, not chastity or promise ring, you ain’t putting a baby in me, man. No way!!!!
Article by Soomto Ajanma
