So a friend of mine finally introduced me to her new ‘boyfriend’. We had heard so much about him that we felt like we already knew him, and then he came over and just seemed…. different. Not in looks or style or anything we could see, he just didn’t seem like the person we expected. She had told us so much about him; how funny he was, how rich, how educated since he claimed he went to high school and university in Canada. So you can imagine our expectations. And she met him on Facebook.
Of course online, he had the perfect profile. They always do. But everyone presents the best version of themselves online anyway so that people can perceive them a certain way. And when you start chatting with them, you slowly grow into a notion that you know them and this is not always the case. In my friend’s case, they had been ‘dating’ for eight months and were ready to finally take the next step. He was back in the country on a work leave and wanted to meet her family and friends, which was where we came in.
After the meeting at a restaurant, as we were about to leave, he stopped to buy some drinks to go when a guy saw him and greeted him in such a familiar way, like they’d known each other for a while. Long story cut short, he was not rich, did not study abroad at any point as the guy who greeted him had lived in the same street with him since he was a child and was friends with him till he moved out four months before.
Of course, it goes without saying that she was devastated as she thought she knew him well but apparently did not. This does not cover all online relationships but according to research, couples who met online are less likely to get married and generally have a poorer relationship quality that those who met offline and the breakup rates for both marital and non-marital romantic relationships were found to be higher for couples who met online that couples who met through offline venues. Too many things online, on social media are not what they seem, people included. You can create a whole new life on social media, particularly Facebook, ranging from your name, to where you live, schooled, work, choice in music, books, taste in fashion, food etc.
I’m definitely not an online relationship kinda girl; I can be friends but if we’re ever going to talk romance, we better meet face to face, relate and date like normal people do. Just saying!!!
Article by Soomto Ajanma
